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Monday, January 30, 2012

five

1 day old

5 weeks- the day we went home from the NICU
8 months

15 months

1 year

2 years

3 years

4 years

My precious son~

I have to admit, this birthday letter to you is a little harder to write than all the others.  I don't even know where to begin!  How is it possible that my baby is FIVE years old?  Andrew, there was once a day that we never knew if you'd even be here today.  And to watch you now, so spunky, so grown up, and so full of life, it just brings tears to my eyes.  You are here.  And that is really all I ever wished for you.  But not only are you here... you are SO much more than I could have ever dreamed.

You are the most amazing little boy I have ever known.  You just emulate happiness and joy wherever you go.  You absolutely love life.  You love everything about it.  You think even the smallest things are the best things in the world (your little glow in the dark dinosaurs, playing games with daddy and just hanging out at home).  You appreciate everything.  You love to be home and be with your family.  Mommy likes to up the ante a little bit and try to give you everything and "show you the world," but you are content.  And that is such a special thing about you, Andrew.  You know what is truly important.  You are wise beyond your years.
Clear Lake, Summer 2011

This has been a big year for you.  A year of changes.  You endured your third open heart surgery.  You were so brave.  I was so scared and worried to have you see your fresh scar running down your chest, but it didn't faze you a bit.  You just went along like you always do, and you bounced back after only 4 days in the hospital.  You amazed us all, as you always do.  You have always been that way- a fighter.  And so full of strength.  You are a living, breathing miracle, Andrew.  I don't want you to ever forget that.  Remember everyday that you are here because God gave you life, and works through you every day to keep you on this Earth with us.
March 10, 2011

You started your last year of preschool this year.  I can't believe it, but next fall you will be in Kindergarten.  You will start the beginning of your school years.  For you, it won't be that much different than what you do now.  But for mommy, it means that you are no longer my baby, and you are growing up!  It is so bittersweet.  While I am so grateful to God for allowing you to grow up, I somehow want to cling to you and keep you my baby forever.  You will always be my baby, Andrew.  I know Kerigan is the baby now...but you were my first little baby.  YOU made me a mommy.  And there is just something extra special about that.  You are so special to us, sweet boy.  You are truly the sweetest little boy we know.  You are so loving to everyone around you.  The way you throw your arms around our necks, give us kisses, and put your little arm around me when we cuddle in bed... it literally melts my heart.  I could stay that way forever.  I just want to freeze time.
You became a big brother this year.  Your precious sister, Kerigan was born, and there has been nothing sweeter for me than to watch you interact with her and love her.  You absolutely adore your baby sister.  Sometimes I think you love her so much you just want to "squeeze" her (which is what many adults say, but you actually do it!  Ha!)  You are the best big brother to her.  She is a very lucky little girl to have you in her life.  I am so proud of both of you.
Your first moments with your sister... July 2011

How grateful I am that I was able to give both of you the chance to have a sibling.  I pray that you will always treasure that opportunity that I never had.  I pray that you will always love each other, and be close.  You are both miracles to me, and you are both very lucky to have each other.  Neither one of you came easy to your mommy and daddy, and we worked hard to get you here!  It is only by the grace of God.  There's something else I never want you to forget!
This fall you were on your very first "team."  You played soccer.  Something else that we never thought you'd be able to do.  Even though there was a little learning curve, I think you had fun!  Mommy and daddy sure had fun going to your games.  I hope and pray it was only the beginning of watching you participate in special activities.  We want you to be able to do everything that you want to do in life.  You deserve it!

You also took tumbling for the first time.  You loved it!  Your favorite thing was jumping on the trampoline!

You are at such a fun age.  I just love it that we can now "hang out" together, and you are so fun to be with!  I like to take you on little dates with me and do special things together.  You are so funny, and you can always make me laugh.  You have come such a long way from that tiny, 3lb 13oz little miracle that blessed our lives five years ago.  Andrew, you are my firstborn.  My first moments with you, when I became a mother... I'll never forget those moments for the rest of my life.  Thank you for fighting!  Those early moments when life was so uncertain... we bonded.  And I know you wanted to know me.  You pushed through and came out on top.  The most special little person I know.  I'm so glad I got to know you.  And I love you more than words can express.

My five year old miracle...

Love Mommy